Mike McLellan

Standing in the British Museum, you are surrounded by statue after statue reflecting what the ancients felt was the ideal human body. It makes you feel inferior no matter how good you look.

Although thinner than most of us, those representations still are heftier than modern America’s idea of perfection.

There were times in history when a man’s wealth was indicated by his belt size.  Reuben painted women who were considered the fairest of all, and they were, shall we say, plump.

Today, society has assumed that fat is no longer fabulous. 

According to several university studies cited in U.S. News and World Report, 74 percent of Americans say they do not like their bodies. Most say that they are overweight.

If you are one of them, you have many different diets from which to choose. You can be a Weight Watcher or a follower of Dr. Atkins or eat like they do on the South Beach. The diet section at the bookstore is also quite stout.

My mother believed that a healthy child was a husky one. She was concerned that I cleaned my plate as she had piled it. In eighth grade I weighed 245 pounds and had to redefine good health for myself. With the help of a physician, I lowered our family food budget by 50 percent.

In the competition for greatest loser, I might be the hands-down winner. By my own calculations, I have lost in excess of 10,000 pounds. Two pounds off, and then I gain them back. Then lose them again.

I am not overweight. I am just too short for what I weigh.

Then again, you do not want to look anorexic. Being too skinny is not in vogue, either. You might need to bulk up and try some supplements. Those who are very thin are also part of the group not happy with their bodies.

Most of us have spent our whole lives, like Goldilocks, trying to find out what it “just right.”

I am not making fun of dieting. A healthy diet is very important. However, I question those whose obsession is to have someone else’s body.

How would you describe yourself? How do the words “fleshy,” “chubby,” “tubby,” “slim” or “scrawny” fit with you?

The fascination with body shape (are you a pear or an apple?) has spawned industries and reality TV shows.

My favorite show in the genre, if you could call it favorite, is “What Not to Wear.” On this program, the co-hosts help inherently happy people grow unhappy with the way they look. They surround them by a 360-degree mirror so they can see all their flaws at the same time.

Once convinced that they could look much better, the subjects are shown the secrets of looking the best they can, given how little they obviously have with which to work.

I have learned a great deal from that program.

For example, horizontal stripes make you look fat. This might be why prison inmates always looked overfed in the old days. Convicts look much better now sans the stripes.

Straight-legged jeans or pants make you look taller. Michael Jordan must always wear straight-legged pants.

If your posterior looks too large, do not cover it up. It just makes it look bigger. You need to wear a shirt that ends in the middle of your rear and, just like magic, it will look half its size.

These shows have taught me that looking good is important to your friends and family.  Being either too fat or too thin is an affront to those close to you.

These shows feed on our discontent with how we look rather than helping us like ourselves enough to maintain good health. Looking good ought to be the byproduct of living well. That, according to health experts, is the key.

We should like ourselves enough to keep ourselves in shape rather than hate who we are and want to be someone else.

Good health is not just what you weigh, it is how you eat and exercise. Emotional health is important too. That starts with accepting our individual biology.

That said, at the British Museum, I liked the statue of Buddha the best.

• Mike McLellan can be contacted by calling and leaving a message at 830-4201 or e-mailing him at This email address is being protected from spam bots, you need Javascript enabled to view it